It’s the week before Christmas as I write this. There’s ringing in my right ear that’s driving me nuts. It’s been ringing since yesterday evening. Tinnitus, perhaps? I don’t know. At forty-two, I’m certainly feeling my age. If I’m crouched on the floor or even sitting on the floor for any lengthy period of time I feel it when I get up, but I’m pleased to not deal with aches and pains when waking in the morning, as I know others my age are beginning to deal with. This ringing in my ear, though . . . yeah fuck this. I hope that shit goes away.
Welcome to Confusions. Delusions, and Formidable Impressions.
As I get older the holiday season doesn’t seem anywhere near as magical as it did when I was young. My son has been over the illusion for several years now. He’s fourteen. Doesn’t want to help decorate the tree or go look at Christmas lights or anything. I don’t blame him. That’s about the age I lost interest in that kind of stuff too. Like so many things in life, I am reminded of how vastly different the world is from when I was a youngster. Part of it is perception. The world seems like such a better place to a kid who has nothing to worry about. But there have certainly been changes. Families get smaller and tradition changes. People move away.
Somewhere along the way, the whimsey of childhood died. I suppose it dies in a different place in time for each of us, and for different reason, but it dies. Is that a part of becoming an adult? Maybe. Or maybe just a part of becoming a jaded human. Maybe a byproduct of experience. I think that writing is the last tether to that whimsey, only I choose to write nasty, scary stories, so the whimsey had been permutated into something dark, but it still remains, if only during those hours I am immersed entirely in my writings.
News
Check out the Yuletide Nightmares Brian Berry put together. This is the absolute perfect time to snuggle up with some holiday themed horror. My story “A Choir of Ill Angels” starts the book off with a bang. Several readers have reached out and told me they liked the story. It’s been described as full-throttle mayhem from beginning to end. It’s a holiday massacre indeed. I sincerely hope you check out the book. There are so many great writers who contributed.
Also, check out Splatterpunk’s Basement of Horrors, edited by Jack Bantry. This one has been getting rave reviews. The Table of Contents is pretty damn amazing, and somehow I weaseled my way in there with a story called “Moches,” which features Chef Fontaine from Broth House. readers told me they wanted to know more about Fontaine’s history before Broth House, so I decided to write some short stories about the chef. This is the first one. It’s doozie.
Recent Reads from Hell
I’m reading Rapture by Thomas Tessier and The Comfy-Cozy Nihilist by Nathan D. Ludwig. Both very good. Also working through the Rold Dahl collection, but took a break from it, only reading stories here and there.
Year End Ramblings
In which I list my accomplishments for 2023. I feel like I will forget something, because I don’t keep track of things the way I would like to. That’s something I want to do better in ‘24.
I published more books this year that I ever have in a single year. This is due to several factors. One, this is the first year of my three-year plan. Last year I had become so disillusioned by the publishing business that I put myself on a three-year plan where I was essentially going to ramp everything up as much as I could. That’s the primary reason I put out so much material. It wasn’t a “throw-everything-at-the-wall-and-see-what-sticks” approach, but more or less following what I have been seeing many others in the indie horror community doing. I can’t predict which books will do well or have an audience, so why not put everything out there? Is this the right approach? Who knows? I will say that despite feelings of defeat that sometimes plague me, when I look at 2023 in retrospect, it was the most successful year in my writing “career” since I published my first novel ten years ago.
Books/novellas/collections
Broth House
Baby Fights
Secret Basements
Infected Voices
Stronger Than Hate (reprint)
This Damned House
Sick! Sick! Sick!
Short Stories
“The Cheap Rooms” in The Never Dead (DeadguyLLC)
”Wrapped in Plastic” Dead and Bloated (Evil Cookie Publishing)
”These Hybrid Moments” an essay in Inside the Indoe Horror World (KJK Publishing)
”Read or Die!” in Books of Horror Community Anthology Vol. 4 Part 2
”Is That Voodoo Doll Anatomically Correct?” in Razor Blade in the Fun-Size Candy (St. Rooster Books)
”More Bite Than Bark” FREE from Blood Bound Books
”Moches” in Splatterpunk’s Basement of Horrors (SplatterPunk Zine)
”A Choir of Ill Children” in Yuletide Nightmares (Slaughterhouse Press)
”Walk the Plank” in Dethfest Confessions: The Devil’s Playlist (Vincere Press)
Final Thoughts
It’s Christmas Eve and the ringing in my ear has been a constant since I started writing this newsletter earlier this week. Isn’t it lovely to experience your meat suit breaking down? My vision seems to get worse by the day, there’s ringing in my ear, I heal much slower than I used to.
But that’s the way it is. We are adaptable. I’ll get used to the ringing and maybe one day seek a specialist about it. I’m still paying the deductible for my weeklong hospitalization in 2021, so the tinnitus might have to wait. And I should probably get my vision checked before that. And who knows, my arm might fall off or something in the meantime.
Anyway, on that chipper note, have a great holiday and a happy new year! My next newsletter will be in 2024, unless there’s a surprise newsletter in the interim . . . a short story for Christmas, perhaps?